In our latest mind-blowing, fur-raising, most epically epic adventure to date when we attempt to travel around the wurld in 42 and a bit days!
What could possibly go wrong?
Pawesome greetings supurr pals
Welcome to Part VI of our latest saga and we know this is the post mew've all been waiting fur since fureffur, so let's get started!
To catch up on the action, here's the link fur last week:
A quick recap from the last episode:
The entire bridge erupted with talk of copious amounts of bacon, until Humphrey said. "Pandora, Astrid seems to have developed some sort of self-awareness and has inadvertently or maybe purrhaps on purrpose, made herself unhackable, so we're stuck with her multi-dimensional trip until I can figure out a way to do something and a bacon sarnie will help my thinking no end!"
Pandora replied. "But 'Umphrey, this machine is dangerous... Astrid could 'av got us all blown up, ve need to take back full control, but yes aftur a bacon butty!"
I rolled my eyes and then turned to Bob. "Bob, are mew coming with or are mew staying here, we'll only be five minutes and then we can get back to saving your wurld from The Eveeel One, ok?"
Bob gulped and said. "Basil, I'll stay here if that's ok, but could I get a bacon butty too?"
I laughed and nodded. "OK dudes and dudettes time to roll, furst we need a photo and then a bacon butty, so let's get moving and no-one is to leave the tour group fur anything, understood?"
The B Team nodded as we headed fur the door. Smooch was on his tablet looking fur bacon butty vendors and would mew believe it, when we opened the TTTB door there was a bacon butty gondola cruising the canal; well mew could have knocked me down with a buttered bun, dipped me in ketchup and I wouldn't have been any more surprised!
"Pandora, go tell that gondola dude on the dock that we will pay him 25 Euro's to ferry us to the bacon butty dude," I said quickly assessing our options.
Pandora nudged Parsley. "Parsley, do mew 'av any Euro's?"
He handed her a 50 Euro note and said. "I want change!" He set the camera drone up as we boarded the gondola, and we were ready fur anything, as long as it had bacon in a bun.
Two minutes later, this was us.
Back in the TTTB Bob sat burbling to himself, when Astrid suddenly spoke in her metallic voice. "Youngling of the Fuzzykin Felines, I would ask that you leave immediately!"
Bob looked up, alert and on guard. "But why?" he asked.
Astrid started to speak and then stopped abruptly.
"Bob! Bob!" I called. "We're back and we got mew a bacon butty."
The little cat-like creature came bounding up to me and jumped into my arms, he looked this way and that until he saw Pandora and waved frantically to her.
I handed him the butty and he stuffed it in his mouth and gulped. "Gosh that was good, do mew have any more?" he asked.
I handed him another and this time he actually stopped to chew it, all the while beckoning Pandora closer. He swallowed and then murmured in Pandora's ear in is native dialect.
Pandora listened intently and nodded, before turning to me. "Basil," she said. "Ve need to talk and it's serious, furry serious!"
I had just crossed Vienna off the Bucket List and looked up to see her terrified expression.
"Humphrey," I said. "Do mew have a device that can allow Pandora and I to talk privately?"
He took another bite from butty number three and said. "Sure I do!" he ambled to the engineering console, opened a cupboard and pulled out a duffel bag. Inside were a pile of silver cones, much like the cone-of-shame. "Put this on," he said to Pandora. Then he handed me one. "Put it on Basil and then push the blue button."
I felt like a nitwit wearing a silver cone, but Pandora was all business, she hit the blue button and gestured fur me to do the same. Which I did.
Immediately we were encased in a blue force-field that shimmered around us like a rippling prismic bubble.
Pandora said in her peculiar little accent. "Bob just told me that Astrid ordered him off the TTTB and that she's up to something bad, he thinks she is vurking vith The Eveeel Vone!"
THE TTTB FLIPS OUT
Still inside the prismic privacy bubble something was niggling at my mind, much akin to a nest of earwigs chewing on grey matter, I said. "What, wait a minute!" I turned and gestured to Parsley. He came right up to the bubble and I noticed how the rippling colours really made his fur come alive. I pointed to the camera drone and mouthed the wurd 'PICTURE' to him. He nodded and turned the camera screen towards me and that's when I saw it.
"Oh fur flips sake!" I sighed heavily.
"Vhat is it Basil?," Pandora asked in her odd little foreign accent.
I pointed at the picture Parsley was holding up and said. "Look at that!"
She gazed at the photo fur a few moments and then exclaimed. "Mon Dieu!"
"Yep OH MY COD!" I replied. "OK not only do we have Astrid on the fritz, the navigation system is also fritzing right now as we were just in Venice, not Vienna!"
"The computer said ve vere in Vienna!" Pandora in puzzlement. "As I 'av neffur been to either I vouldn't know vhat they look like."
"Me either," I answered somberly. "But his leads me to believe that there's something much much bigger a-paw than I furst thought!"
"But vhat made mew think that ve vere in the wrong country?" Pandora asked.
"Fur starters what was the chance of there being a bacon butty gondola right there when we wanted one?" I mused. "Seriously the odds of that are billions to one, and then I suddenly remembered that my Great Uncle Aluicious sent me a postcard years ago from Venice..." I paused fur a moment. "Then we have Bob on-board and Astrid randomly fritzing... there's something just not right going on. We need to get to the bottom of it asap, can mew check the navigation logs and all future destinations?"
"Of course I can," Pandora replied. "I'll get straight on it, but are ve going to tell the others vhat Bob said?"
I nodded. "Give Humphrey the cone furst so I can explain effurything to him on the QT."
She nodded and pushed the blue button on her cone.
One by one the entire B Team came into the bubble and I relayed our findings. Snowie was last in the bubble and she said. "Actually I preferred Venice, so we don't need to go to Vienna."
"Snowie, that's not the issue, the issue is this," I said. "The nav system has gone rogue, Astrid is not wurking correctly and as fur Bob, I'm now wundering if he's legit or not!"
Snowie glanced at me, her lucid golden eyes glimmering in the soft light on the bridge. "Basil I didn't tell mew this but I was using my lie-detector app on my purrsonal paw PC and I scanned him throughout the entire conversation with Pandora. Basil, Bob is on the level fur sure!"
I nodded thoughtfully as I processed Snowies findings. "OK then," I conceded. "Bob's on the level and needs our help, Astrid is an unknown right now and speaking of unknowns where are those RMD's I could murdurize a niptini right now!"
Snowie laughed and disengaged from the prismic privacy bubble and shouted as she clapped her paws together. "We need refreshments!"
I turned off my cone and removed it, giving it back to Humphrey with a wink. He nodded and placed it back in its bag.
Bob looked terribly wurried and rather petrified as I approached him with Pandora. I gave Pandora the nod and she began explaining effuything to Bob in ancient Su-Meowian.
Suddenly the Robotic Mouse Droids appeared with silver trays bearing drinks. I reached out and grabbed two as RMD #1 trundled by on its little wheels. I downed them both just as Pandora finished with Bob.
She gave me the nod, as did Bob and the fear and wurry seemed to ebb from his fuzzy, little face.
Parsley and Smooch were talking in sign language again it was getting rather animated as Fudge sidled up to me and said softly. "Basil we've got another problem."
As if my day couldn't get any wurse, I grabbed two more glasses of bright green liquid as RMD #2 trundled by. "Tell me," I said wearily and downed the drinks.
"Well I did as mew asked and it seems that there's a lot of stuff missing," he said cryptically.
It took me a moment to grasp what he was saying, but then it sank in and my heart sank too.
"How much stuff?" I queried.
"About two thirds of the original inventory!" he said.
"Mew'd better go tell Humphrey, Parsley and Smooch," I replied. "Then see if mew can't find out what happened to it all."
Fudge nodded and bounded off towards the engineering console.
I sat in my chair, the pleather squeaking as I smooshed my derriere into it. 'Can this get any wurse,' I thought. 'Two thirds of our weapons and ammo are now missing and Cod knows what else is a-paw! And now we've got be so careful what we say in the open, oh fur flipping flips sake...'
Amber appeared at my side with Posie hovering just above the ground.
"Basil," Amber said softly. "The TTTB has locked me out of all systems."
Posie nodded and then added. "I'm going to go into the TTTB's inner matrix to see what the purroblem is."
"OK," I said. "But purrlease be careful, mew know how certain things affect mew!"
Posie smiled and replied. "Basil I'm always careful." And she vanished.
"Amber," I asked. "So what are the chances of us getting this show back on the road?"
"If Posie can find something definitively wrong with the matrix and we can fix it, it shouldn't be too long but if nothing is wrong with the matrix then who knows..."
I was just about to speak when the TTTB fired up all on its own...
I heard Humphrey shout offur my comms unit. "Dude I'm on level 2, and I just ran a diagnostic from the engineering console down here and it blew up!"
"What?" I almost squeaked.
"Parsley just put it out with an extinguisher," Humphrey answered. "But I think the console was tampered with, there's a strange odour, not one that I would associate with an electrical fire... I don't think it was an accident... I think someone else is on-board!"
"Tell me that again!" I spluttered.
"I think there are other purrsons or purrson aboard," Humphrey said. "Smooch is scanning the entire TTB on all frequencies, so it could take a few minutes."
"OK, let me know as soon as mew find something," then I added. "Humphrey, are we still in motion?"
"No we're not, the TTTB just flipped out and I think we're free-floating, check the exterior cameras," he answered quickly.
I switched on the monitors from the console on my right and looked right into nothing...
"Humphrey, where the flip are we?" I asked.
"From all indications we're in limbo in the Nether Void," he replied. "Parsley just confirmed it."
"Nether Void?" I queried.
"In essence we're stuck between time and space," he explained. "We are in the space equivalent of No-Mans Land."
"And how do we get back to our time space reality?" I pressed.
"We can't, not until the TTTB is fully functioning," Humphrey answered rather soberly. "We need to determine why this happened and who or what caused it."
I sighed heavily and asked Bob to go get me another drink. "Humphrey," I said quietly. "Get the remaining inventory moved up here, and we'll reconvene, ok?"
"Sure thing Basil, I'll get the Heathens to move it all, I'm too old fur that s***!" Humphrey said dryly. "Offur and out!"
Bob handed me a glass of a pink foamy substance with a small umbrella and a twist of lime stuck on the edge of the glass with one of those really yummy cherries. "Bob, little dude what's this?" I asked.
"It's a Purra Collida, try it, I'm sure mew'll luff it!" Bob grinned at me.
I raised an eyebrow rather surreptitiously and said guardedly. "Bob where did mew get it?"
"From my bag, it's a drink we have at home and I brought a flask with me," he said, eyes bright and shining.
I nodded, sniffed it and then sipped. The flavour flowed and then burst all offur my tongue, it was incredible; sweet, savoury, juicy, and mouthwatering all at the same time. I gasped. "Bob this is amazing, it tastes like nip-sarsaparilla with a double iced-cream float!"
Bob clapped his little paws together excitedly and laughed. "I knew mew'd luff it!" he squealed in delight.
I took another sip and sank back into my chair suddenly feeling rather chilled and a lot less anxious about free-falling through the Nether Void.
'Great furmilly vay-cay!' I thought, taking another sip of my Purra Collida. "Snowie and Humphrey's Bucket List is all but ruined... the TTTB is a complete liability and the only good news right now is Bob and his magic flask!'
Suddenly, out of the blue the alarm sounded.
Then a few seconds later Astrid came online and began to countdown.
Nearly dropping my glass, I yelled. "What the freakin' flip is going off?"
Snowie was the furst to answer. "Basil, I was just checking long range scanners and it seems that we are not alone in the Nether Void!"
At that moment I heard Fudge, Parsley, Smooch and Humphrey screaming like gurls offur my headset and I decided to join them.
It's that time of the post, when we bet mew've more questions than mew can shake your tail at!
OMC How could mew leave us hanging like that and we've got a whole week to wait?!
OH MY COD!!!!! OH MY COD!!!!! OH MY COD!!!!!
Like seriously ~ What the flip is going on?
Who else could be on-board?
Who do mew think have taken your weapons stash and where are they now?
Jeez, that Nether Void looks bleak, will mew be able to leave anytime soon?
What's this matrix thing and how could it harm Posie?
Who else has just turned up in the Nether Void?
What does the countdown mean?
What are mew actually counting down to?
Has Astrid gone to the dark side?
Is the Eveeel One responsible fur this latest threat?
Ohhhh those Purra Collida's look rather tasty, can we get one ?
If mew have any questions, or would like to offur input, leave us a comment, as mew know we luffs them so much! MOL
Join us fur Part Seven of our Summer Blockbuster next Tuesday, when we continue on our epically epic adventure.... who knows what will happen.... as now we've got a countdown happening to an unknown event and most of our weapons are missing!
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Bunker Background Images used under license from Shutterstock.com
All Destination Backgrounds & cuneiform tablet used under paid Pizap Licence